Movie Reviews: Half Past Dead




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     Screen Gems (1 hr. 51 min.)
     A criminal mastermind breaks into a high-security prison to get an inmate to reveal the location of stolen gold bullion.
     Morris Chestnut, Steven Seagal, Ja Rule, Kurupt, Nia Peeples
Bottom Line:


After starring in that gad awful cops and robbers drama, "Exit Wounds" with rapper DMX, I finally got pudgy Steven Seagal exactly where I want him — locked away on Alcatraz.

Problem is, even locked away he won’t quit making predictable B-movies.

This time using two rappers for the price of one, (Ja Rule and Kurupt) and it’s still no bargin, Seagal stars as Sascha Petrosevitch, an undercover FBI agent who just happens to be on Alcatraz when it’s taken under siege by a criminal gang, led by "Under Siege" veteran Morris Chestnut. In fact, I’m still trying to figure out why they just didn’t name this flick "Under Siege 3" and call it good.

In a familiar role, Seagal (wearing a do-rag and a billowing blue jumpsuit) just happens to be in the wrong place at the right time to use his martial arts skills to systematically pick off the baddies who are trying to spring Lester (Bruce Weitz) a born-again killer/thief who has buried $200 million worth of stolen gold. The odds are 20 to one, but the bad guys don’t stand a chance.

Bathed in blue light and a blaring rap score in the background, the action scenes resemble an MTV video where the editing is so quick and cutting, you can’t tell who the hell is shooting whom.

But it doesn’t matter, because this is the kind of film where thousands of rounds of ammunition are fired at point-blank range and no one gets hurt.



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